I DON’T

Day fifteen of my retirement

and I am still a bit too concerned about what kind of problems are being had……

…….without me there

I have to keep reminding myself

I DON’T WORK THERE ANYMORE!

And I feel good about that fact, but I’m carrying on with a residual sense of responsibility for it all

I’ve had a few calls from them with questions and I’ve provided answers

and I worry that my answer might not be good enough

but I don’t want to get drawn back in because

I DON’T WORK THERE ANYMORE!

And I blame only me — not them– for the fact that I still feel some angst about the whole thing

They can ask anything.  I’m the one with the choices

and I can answer, or not, because

I DON’T WORK THERE ANYMORE!

…..and for my mental and emotional and physical health,

I need to just relax for awhile

and get over this cold, and see what unfolds

as I head down this uncharted road

I have shouldered a lot of responsibility for a hell of a long time

I gave (literally) years of notice as to when  I would be retiring.

I have earned the right to say no and if I hadn’t or haven’t,

it’s still not up to me to fix anything because

I DON’T WORK THERE ANYMORE!

And the people in charge might actually not be expecting anything more of me

This could be all in my own head

because they may understand even better than me that

I DON’T WORK THERE ANYMORE!

 

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Be Okay–starting now

 

fullsizeoutput_a57see me

be

disconsolate

and

weary

even though

there is so much to be happy about

and so much that I appreciate

what is the deal?

why not just be okay while I am okay?

okay.

 

She

She, they all said at her funeral,

was strong and carried on without complaint

     in the face of adversity.

Dealt with difficult times

     with admirable stick-to-it-iveness and optimism.

She, they all said at her funeral,

     loved life and traveling and painting.

What might they say about me

     in some future and similar scenario?

She, they might say at my funeral

     was strong and complained fairly often

          in the face of adversity.

Dealt with difficult times

     with stubborn resistance and eventual acceptance.

She, they might say at my funeral,

    loved life and staying home and writing

and watching Netflix

 

 

 

Image

Now that’s just pretty

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Standing, Still

This is where I am

Here and now

Icy predictions

cannot deter me

I am one among many

We carry on

in the face of

considerable opportunities

for dire consequences

Impressive

if you think about it

 

 

 

A sauce for stir fry

So I made some creamed corn by mixing some coconut cream (about 2/3 of a cup or so) with a tablespoon of Earth Balance spread,  a couple of teaspoons of sugar, thickened with a tablespoon or so of cornstarch.  I sauteed that for a bit and then I added in a can of  white corn .  I threw in some celery, onion, peas, and a clove of garlic and seasoned it with basil, salt, pepper and a tablespoon of Braggs Aminos.  I cooked some rice and then mixed it all up with the sauce…. and it was good.

 

It Occurs to Me….

It occurs to me

That I need not be

Accountable on any date

For every possible twist of fate

Responsibility has its place

And doggedly persevering

can win the race

But….

Advice to me was recently given

That there’s a time in space

For being driven

And…

This is something good to know:

There is also a time to

LET. IT. GO.

Mushrooms

Cooking mushrooms with green peppers and onion along with garlic-pepper seasoning seems to be something that continues to be a part of my favorite meals.

Using water as the medium instead of oil, seems to be working well for me.

It’s fresh.  It’s vegan.  And I think it is even nutritious. 

A Spoon from a Tree

So…….my husband made this spoon for me for Christmas. From a branch that was trimmed from our maple tree. The wood is called spalted maple. I don’t plan on using it to cook with since he used danish oil as a finish but it sure looks beautiful in my kitchen.

Looking at the Moon. In the Snow. Without socks

 

Beautiful, hazy moon tonight! The snowy driveway feels good under feet with socks and no shoes — it doesn’t even feel cold on the ground; the air, though, WAY cold!!

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